Certificate of Incompletion

I lost my favourite 4mm long Addi Turbo circular needle. It's rather hard to concentrate on anything else. There are mittens to be knit!!

The tree is up and decorated. The boxes and tissue paper are strewn all over the dining room table still. You just have to keep your eyes in the direction of the tree and ignore all the mess in the perimeters. I baked up a storm last Sunday, and within two days, all the goodies were gone. Luckily I prepared two big balls of cookie dough and stored them in the back of the fridge in advance, so I can have fresh holiday goodies ready within any given hour. It’s taken me years to get this good. I do wonder though, how a grumbly sick man can eat an entire batch of chocolate chip almond biscotti in four days. I found this incredibly odd considering he wouldn't drink coffee all week and moaned about everything and anything, yet ate these rock hard cookies that were meant to dip in coffee. Am I the only one that thinks this is criminal?

People are falling ill all around me. The ladies in the office are looking frighteningly mad, and J has been popping Advil Cold & Sinus pills and washing them down with spoonfuls of Buckleys. It’s only a matter of time that this virus attacks me and the girls. I know my immune system is one of beauty – it’ll take something strong to take me down. Frankly I am surprised that B is still standing. That kid picks up everything and anything. She has taken to hiding from me when I get home because I poke and prod the crap out of her and give her the third degree to see how she’s holding up being in the centre of this festering cesspit of nasty germs.

My stomache was beginning to hurt, but mysteriously stopped once I left the office. If I am going to get sick, I need it to happen asap. I think it’s best to get this over now rather than spend my holidays in the fetus position on the floor beside the toilet. Bring it on.

N